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Keep Smiling

May 29, 2012

Last week I experienced something absolutely mind-boggling.

My husband and I were flying to Dominican Republic for a business convention and I realized that I was no longer afraid of flying.  Typically, I am a big mess of worry, and in sensory overload.  I do not like small spaces, I enjoy personal space, need fresh air and flying challenges my ability to tolerate all of that being taken away. Not to mention that some person I do not know has my life in their hands as they fly the plane.

This trip though was different. I enjoyed it. The sensation of take off became exhilarating and looking out the window when the plane turned and seeing the world below was breathtaking.

Since this was so weird I had to think about why.

The answer I came away with was that my life has become so unpredictable and at times frightening, that I have had to adjust mentally. When my husband was diagnosed with a progressive neurological disease and our lives changed pretty drastically I came to realize some new truths.

1) I’m not in control

2) Life is uncertain.

3) Life is painful

4) Life will always have moments of beauty

5) No matter what, as long as I keep perspective and seeking Beauty…I can navigate through it.

I am happier now than I ever have been.  The image that comes to my mind when I think of my life is of me standing in a hurricane and watching the wind, waves and rain….and smiling as everything around me gets torn to bits.

More on this later…

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