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May 29, 2012

My goal for the next several weeks is to push against my created comfort zone when it comes to self-restraint in writing. The tendency, as I am writing, is that I sound too formal…what is happening isn’t raw enough for the story I am telling.  My attempted reasoning is that even if I manage to push too far I can reel it back in during the editing process, which is how I was able to move past the “this is crap” trash talking followed by massive deletion. (see…right there, I wrote crap, I am not even fully comfortable with crap. My first impulse was to write shit…but I couldn’t do it, so I just did) Ever see The King’s Speech? The part where the guy had the king say swear words, and he came up with very tame ones? That is me.  Or maybe even Ned Flanders.

My new mantra is: What I write is allowed to be crap, and it will be allowed to disturb me. And I will write from that model.

Bret Easton Ellis…is who I keep thinking about.  American Psycho was the first book I ever read through, that troubled me so much that I tossed it in the trash. I cannot see any restraint to his imagination as he writes.  I admire that about his writing, even if it gives me bad dreams, and I worry about his mental state.



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